A few days ago, I read this lovely article on introverts and their ‘woes’. Needless to say, I related to it: Introverts Explained: Why we love you but need to get away from you.
The author writes:
“Introverts are not all recluses hanging out in dusty homes with cats and classic books (not that there’s anything wrong with cats and classic books;). We get out and rock it, but then we need to withdraw from that buzz because if we don’t we will feel like an overdone steak, no life, no juice.”
Yes! I am not a recluse (though sometimes I think I could be quite happy living as one); I just need to be by myself sometimes. Or, often. Totally alone, no one else in the vicinity. Even sitting in the same room as another person quietly can be much too energy-draining.
“The other day I heard a fun-loving morning show radio host say she needs to be in the house alone often in order to be civil. Having someone in another room of the same house isn’t good enough. She can feel them there.”
I have a beautiful friend who is very sensitive like me. She makes sure to nurture and care for her introversion with love and kindness rather than force herself into situations in which she feels uncomfortable. She inspires me to make ‘the world work for me’, rather ‘me work for the world’. Sensitive people need to create our own safe space away from the world in order to flourish when we enter back into it.
“It’s especially difficult for children. I’ve seen my daughter’s friends question her relentlessly when she says she is going to play with her dolls after school instead of playing at the friend’s house. You mean you’d rather play alone than play with me?”
Yes! As a kid, I remember frequently feeling guilty and abnormal for not wanting to be social more often. Instead, I preferred to read by myself, draw, or sit quietly. I even thought that there was something wrong with this. (Not so, dear friend!)
Our brains process everything so deeply it’s tiring. We need time to live in our inner world. We need to recoup bubbly energy by visiting our thoughts, creativity and feelings. We need to go internal in order to express ourselves generously externally. Solitude expands us (and everyone really). It makes space within us so that we can take in more from the outside.
If you happen to first meet me on a random night out when I’m in social butterfly mode, you might quickly conclude that I’m an extrovert with energy for days. Au contraire: after a bubbly night out, recuperation time begins. Lots of time alone, to be. Peace.
I highly recommend reading the article – linked above – in its entirety if you or someone you know has introvert qualities. We are all special, in our own ways. 🙂